Dr. Jane On Narcissists

Narcissists can come in all shapes, sizes and forms.  They maybe your spouse / partner, work colleagues, a family member or someone in your social and friendship circles.

Narcissists are a bit like the weather, one minute you can have a tornado in your life, damaging, corrosive, undermining. And the next it’s like a small breeze, just waiting for the next excuse to turn into a howling gale.

The main thing about narcissists is they like to promote uncertainty, anxiety and often fear in others to get the control in their lives they so desperately crave.  This could be control of a situation or control of others, but with control they believe they have admiration, value, worth.

Anyone living with a narcissist or having one in their life, it can be dreadful and abusive.  Having to walk on eggshells, confused, undermined to name just a few of the feelings having a narcissist in your life brings. 

When not getting their own way many narcissists will not think twice about threatening or actually using physical violence. They will exploit &  use your emotions & confusion as a way of getting whatever it is they want.  

No matter how small, know that there is help out there for you.  Here are just some of the places that can offer support.  That maybe just reading other peoples’ experiences of being in a narcissistic relationship which can help you get the strength to change your situation.

Below is just a small section of help, do Google your specific country for more detailed help.  And if your are worried about your search history, do it in a private tab or a different PC, a friend’s or at your library, somewhere the narcissist will not be able to trace.


National Domestic Abuse Helpline

Give Us A Shout

Young Minds

Women’s Aid

Mankind (For Men)



.Surviving Narcissism

The Hotline

Women’s Health


New Zealand






Flying Monkeys Denied